Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Every Mother Counts

At fourteen, my mother died from cancer.  Her death represents the great divide in my life between childhood and womanhood. My grieving father was incapable of taking care of my six younger siblings, so, for them, I became a substitute mother for a brief time while my father tried to put together the pieces of his broken heart. And while my younger siblings sure missed her cooking as they grew tired mine, they were appreciative of what love and comfort I was able to give them. This experience, for me, defines what it is to be a mother: being able to show compassion and love for another even while experiencing great pain.

Now, my days are spent in giggling play with my two young daughters, Grace and Eliza.  Frequent are the moments too special for words.  Today on my morning walk, my ears were filled with the music of laughter as I reached into the stroller to ‘get them’. While relishing these moments, I know that I became a mother long before my Grace was born, and I am grateful for the many substitute mothers I have had that have taught me how to love more purely.

#Alt Summit believes every mother counts

Thursday, May 2, 2013

Aunt Bernie

We had a visit from my oldest sister Bernadette this past week and it was really special to have her here. I was 35 weeks pregnant all week and kept joking with her that I was going to have the baby each day and she would say you better not have the baby while I am here. I even once went as far as saying my water had broke and she looked like she was going to pass out at the thought. Her and Will gave me a hard time about that joke for a couple a days as they should have done.  Little Grace really enjoyed having Aunt Bernie to play with each day. We went for a few walks and did a lot of day to day things, but Bernadette really came put her mad photos skills to work and helped me a with a updating a good amount of my photo organizing. And I even learned how to cut Will's hair from her which was scary but really fun. Will is such a champ. In addition little Grace received a cute little baby doll of her own from Aunt Bernie. She keeps saying Baby. Let's hope the baby and her can become friends over the next year. I will love them both and do what I can to make that possible. Despite the third trimester being a challenge on me I find so much joy in what is ahead for our family.

Sunday, April 21, 2013


Grace has had this thing for flowers for some time now. She will sound out the f sound and struggles to say the rest of the word while doing the sign for flower. We put flowers on the walls of her bedroom and she is constantly trying to say flower during diaper changes. I soak it up as I watch her try so hard to figure out how to say this word.

Her favorite pastime while at her grandparents house is picking the dandelions(flowers) in the front yard. Her Grandpa is happiest when she picks the yellow ones most of all. She will even bring me a hand full and I can't help but smile and tell her thank you. This reminds me of when I was little doing the same thing with by brothers and sister in our front yard on the farm in Wyoming. I love moments like that when I am brought back to good memories so long ago. After all, the past is a part who we each are today, and remind us of what matters most in the moments of each day.

Sunday, April 14, 2013


Grace is 18 months old this week and started nursery at church today. She must have had fun because I could hardly get her to leave when it was time to go. What a joy it is seeing a child grow!

Monday, April 8, 2013


Lately Grace has found it so funny that she can shut the door but in end always ends up crying that she can not open them when she want to just yet. The other day she climbed up on one of the chairs I had moved and spend about 5 mins trying to figure out the door knob she could finally reach. Oh my dear determined child.

Wednesday, January 23, 2013


It's raining today and this little girl has been saying outside over and over again for the last 10 mins while trying to crawl out the window. Never a dull moment.

Sunday, January 13, 2013


I have six sisters, and have had at least four of them my whole life. I can't imagine what life would be like not having all six of them. Sisters for me have been those I have been able to come to when I have needed a sounding board or strength that I struggled to find on my own. We've laughed, played and have cried together over the years. It is always so much fun to hear everyone talk about the memories of our ups and downs of times past when we get are together.

We just got news that week at my 20 week ultra sound that little Grace will be having a little sister of her very own. The two of them will be around 19 months apart and I hope with all my heart that they can be good friends. I am planning as best as a mother can but I am sure the four of us will have our moments of humor and hiccups as we grow together as a family. Will thinks that Grace is going be an excellent big sister.  Family is what matters most and for our two little girls to have each other means the world.  I feel that one of the greatest gifts parents can give to their child is their siblings.  As parents we could not be happier then to hear this wonderful news. I look forward to snuggling with our little girls together and all the fun thing we will get to do together. My heart is full.